So You’ve Been Diagnosed with Cancer: A Game Plan For Your Next Moves
To start, we’re so deeply sorry that this diagnosis has become part of your reality. We know exactly how you feel, and we can confidently tell you that even though this news hit like a ton of bricks, it does NOT define you. This is just a chapter. Below, we’re sharing the very steps we took when we were on our own cancer journeys.
Most importantly—don’t forget to breathe. We know it’s heavy, but we hope the info here helps lighten the load.
BREATHE
Whether it’s taking the deepest breath of your life, doing box breathing (breathe in for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, repeat!), or trying 4-7-8 (inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale for 8), just breathe. Your life may feel like it’s spinning, with a million thoughts racing—How do I tell my family? My friends? What about my job? My plans?! But breathing is your first action toward taking control of the unknown.
NEXT...SCREAM.
Or stomp your feet, wave your arms, have a full-blown adult temper tantrum. It’s not fair. It’s beyond messed up. But you’re here, and the worst thing you can do is bottle up all that anger and fear. LET. IT. OUT.
Whatever it is, find your way to release the anger and the hurt. You can’t keep that bottled up.
Here are some ways to release all that pent-up energy:
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Car Scream – Get in your car, drive to a secluded spot (seriously, avoid alarming anyone nearby), roll down the windows or keep them up, and scream as loud as you can. Release it.
Kesley’s advice: “For me, I was driving back to LA from Arizona after telling one of my best friends about my diagnosis. I had to pull over in the middle of the desert and just let it out. It felt like I was going to explode if I didn’t. I screamed until I nearly lost my voice, and afterward, I felt so light—like I was floating.” - Impromptu Boxing class – That punching bag or pillow or couch cushion? It’s your cancer, your diagnosis, your paused plans, all the frustration. Now, we don’t condone violence but beating up pillow is surprisingly comforting.
- Dance it out – Punch the air, kick, stomp, shake your body, wave your arms, go wild. Get it all out.
SHARING THE NEWS
This was one of the hardest parts for both of us. Because saying it out loud makes it real. But here’s the thing—you don’t have to tell everyone unless you want to. It can be exhausting holding space for other people’s emotions while trying to process your own. Don’t go through this alone, but share at your own pace. For us, we told our close family and friends, and they helped spread the news, allowing us to focus on what was ahead. Kesley even made an Instagram video to thank everyone for their love and support. Throughout our journeys, we shared updates on Instagram, which made it easier than giving weekly updates to everyone individually.
We also created a guide to help you share the news with loved ones. It includes tips on what NOT to say to someone with a diagnosis and ways they can support you. It’s part of our prompt bundle with other resources. You can find the link to download below.
TELL YOUR EMPLOYER
Document. Document. Document! The sooner your employer knows, the sooner you can work out options for time off, rest days, or any support you might need. We both worked during chemotherapy, and while it served as a good distraction, we knew when to dial it back and put our health first. Kesley arranged for Thursdays and Fridays to be her light days, while Blythe made sure her agents knew she was still working through treatment, even landing gigs like Neutrogena and Beyond Meat commercials, filming a movie, and the Walker show post-surgery.
The key? Communicate clearly so everyone knows where you stand.
PLAN & PREPARE FOR CHEMOTHERAPY
If chemotherapy is part of your treatment plan, it can be scary—mostly because it’s the unknown. We’ve all seen how cancer is portrayed in movies and TV shows, but we’re here to tell you: This is NOT Hollywood, and your story is your own. Let us help ease the drama and carve out a new narrative where you feel calm within the chaos. When you’re prepared, you’re powerful. We put together a info packed guide for you below to map out your next steps.
